So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

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So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

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What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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