Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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Wanna hear a dead baby joke? Brittany Spears is pregnant

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What is the diffrents between a Mexican and a elevator? one can raise children the other is a mexican!!!!!

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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