What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

How do you enter a gas station? Through the front door

why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...