whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

thumb_up thumb_down -22

a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? By grounding her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

thumb_up thumb_down -22

i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops