Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

No soup for you!

What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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