What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future

the bible

Zafarfanugen the third: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bob: Who cares about some dumb chicken crossing the road! I am more interested in why three generations of your family would continually use such a ridiculous name!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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