What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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You know what's gay?? Lesbians

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the wild black man is searching for food. He spots a KFC, and goes wild. He then proceeds to get in line.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops