A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

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Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Cheese and toast

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

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There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

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What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

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why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

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Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

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What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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