Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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What do you call a moose with a 12 gauge shotgun bullet through it's head? Open Season

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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Q: What happens when the Hydro goes out? A: The Hydro goes out.

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Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

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Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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Ron Paul for President!

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Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS JOKE??? A: Another joke you didn't think was funny... REFRIGERATOR!! O.k. Now it's funny!

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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whats worse than a wussy times two a wusst times three i like boobs u basterds suck a dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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