I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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lebron

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Knock knock

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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