Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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