A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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