Dogs

Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

How high is a Chinaman

Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

potatoes

whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

Q-what did the black man say before he crossed the road? A-i wanna cross the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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