What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

Your mom is so...wonderful.

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

nick toth

why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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