Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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A blind man walked into a bar and got a beer and got drunk and went on a rampage and killed YOUR MOM

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old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

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Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

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A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

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why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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roses are red... violets are blue ..... Cancer

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

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Isn't a coincidence that the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the 4th of July are on the same day? Weird

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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don't read this

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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What is your bill about? Clinton

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Why did the boy cry Because he fell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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