Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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I like Pi. It can make circles.

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What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

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What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

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brock has small hands for a small job

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

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how many jews can you fit in a volkswagon? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 6 million in the ash trey.

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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An Asian, a white man and a black man were running in a race. The Asian won and the black man came second due to his lack of training and motivation over the past couple of months.

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So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

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You just made me realize something friend, and for that I am grateful, I quit and left the remains of what could have been put together again, I mean if the chance was there, I betrayed both you and myself by leaving a sinking ship. I keep telling myself that our dream has no chance of becoming real in a world where people lack what we consider vision, individuality. Now I realize that by losing faith in humanity accepting their individuality and becoming an author of fiction, I have indeed lost my own belief in a greater world, this of course being reflected upon the fact that I write fiction, rather than speeches and well, what I once considered wisdom. Its just that its lonely at the top, the wiser you become, the more alienated you become from the rest, and if others no longer grasp our concepts of wisdom, strength honor, love and such.. Then I suppose that we just end up lonely, as aliens in a world full of monkeys, until I have begun questioning myself if I am just an arrogant prick, and taken that for an answer. Then it does not matter if you have one follower or a million... ...The sensation of solitude, becomes overwhelming, I guess I have been looking around the world for a definition, rather than following my own heart. Listen, I wont pretend to be you, but I will gladly join you, but if you cannot accept us as equals, I decline. Hey on the brighter side, I always got a "man that likes men" vibe out of you, I suppose I got myself a fan huh? Someone trying to copycat me. Damn, I feel broken, or maybe I just realized how broken I have allowed myself to become, lets say you are not really a woman and where using this in order to break me. Then I gotta say you got me there, and I am not proud of that, I guess that you trying, where I gave up, makes you the better one regardless.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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