What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

hi hi strager danger

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

Invisible Television.

What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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