Why did the kid cry? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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Knock Knock Come in.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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YOU

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Nothing they are disgusting and pollute your body with fats that are not necessary for you to live. -CNN.com 11.78534629/10 scientists agree with this fact.

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What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

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I was strolling along the countryside and saw 2 niiggers peacefully hanging from a tree

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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