Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Cole is "good" at soccer

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

Arron Glass

Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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