What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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