Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

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hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

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one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

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What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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What did Hitler say to his empire, A lot of stuff that I am to lazy to look up, all i know that the holocaust was bad and we shouldn't repeat it.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

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Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

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What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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