a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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My real life is like my iPad I don't have an iPad.

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Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

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Why was a member of the KKK laughing at another member who was his friend? Because he had just divorced his black wife who he recently found out that he had received AIDS from.

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he was to busy watching porn. And then was hit by a truck.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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What did the Pitchfork say to the Gremlin? Nothing, because its a pitchfork, and gremlin's don't exist.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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And so i say to the preist ........... pass the bananas

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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what did the lamp say to the hand? You turn me on

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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What did the doctor say to the man with cancer? You have cancer.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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