A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the jew drop his coin? beacuse a nazi killed him before he put it in his pocket

thumb_up thumb_down -19

how long has dibey got left like :)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats white and all over my room? paint

thumb_up thumb_down -41

the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -40

So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops