Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

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Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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What is worse then not being able to drink your vodka right away A black guy drinking for you

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

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The WNBA

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Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

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Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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a man walks into a bar and it hurts

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What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops