A man walks in to a bar, so he got hurt.

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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Chuck Norris can cook ramen noodles with a microwave.

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

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(In a job interview) Interviewer: Name a time when you've failed sometime Me: I failed an HIV test last June, anything else?

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

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woman's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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hey John will you make some copies

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

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Q.why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A. because he was dead.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops