What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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A man walks in to a bar, so he got hurt.

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

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Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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Chuck Norris can cook ramen noodles with a microwave.

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If Jim lives in north carolina, what does that make his dad's brother? Black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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