Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. unless you're color blind...

What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

L's I's that took Viagra.

There once was a man who had a penis that was so big, his girlfriend liked it a lot. A year later they got married and had kids, but then the man lost his accounting job and things went downhill.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

Wait what? I did not type that!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

Where is Osama now? Telling this joke.

What did the fish say when it was being fried? That's crazy, fish can't talk.

If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

What do you call a retarded black man? His name

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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