What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 2,091,029,203,284,485,389,684,564,345,089,859,849,485,374,094,394,584,584.00002394832323945834958349234854343432323343534342323243543534234358394564023285409564053942304923049234 x 10 to the 1234543565342312323560845834034th power divided by 0.

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

What do you call a gay couple with jobs and a kid?? Responsible.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

Thats what she said......about the project proposal, it was some really valuable input.

What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

What's red and sticky A DEAD BABY

What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

You know what's catchy? A cold

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

What us black and white and read all over The newspaper

What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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