How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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What's black and always in the back of a cop car? The seat.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard with a camel? Sacked from the zoo.

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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Wanna here a good joke?

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Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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heads up!

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Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

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What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

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How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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