How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

Knock Knock Who's there? You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy. You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy, who?

There once was a man from Dundee. He got stung by an angry wasp. He put some Bactine on it. He lied down and took a rest He felt much better the next morning.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

angelosnyder is not gay

What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...