What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

Where is Osama now? Telling this joke.

Q: why didn't the little black boy have a father? A: because he unfortunately died at the age of 48 with pancreatic cancer.

what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

What's the difference between a BMW and a murder victim? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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