Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

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Why the boy doesn't get any birthday presents? he has cancer.

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Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

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A movie trilogy about an alphabet book. A ten minute long movie about a complete lifespan. A 600 pages long book on how to stop procrastination. A two page book about the top 600 award winning pictures. CALL NOW FOR A TELESCOPE INCLUDED! (So you can see the stars and fuck the book altogether) Juggernaut: IM THE JUGGERNAUTBITCH! Me: Hi, mind if I just call you bitch for short? Your life sucks sometimes because Karma is a bitch... ...My bitch ;)

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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In Soviet Russia... People Die for Voicing their Opinions

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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A blind man walks past a fish market, pauses, takes in a big sniff, and says, "Good morning ladies!" to the women walking by wearing too much perfume.

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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What did the alcoholic say to his priest? I'm Drunk. The priest says "Your drunk go home". He barely makes it.

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What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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