what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Roses are red Violets are blue we're going to have sex because i'm stronger than you

What's worse than World War II? World War III.

you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

"33"

why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

What's black and looks like Burnt Popcorn? A black man

I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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