What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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