Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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Get in the car.

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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