What is the difference between a woman and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is the most common term for adult females of the human race.

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

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A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

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My tractor broke down.

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A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

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why did the man start living on the street? he lost his job, his wife left him, and had his identity stolen.

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69

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

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You wanna hear something dirty? A pile of garbage. That's dirty.

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Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

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whats up fuch you bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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