Michael Jackson's favorite places: Toystore Candy shop Playground Amusment parks Kindergarden classroom Orphanige

knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

how do you start a stamped in mexico roll a nickle down the street sad thing is you just lost a nickle

Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

A woman was at a family reunion and her husband's mother walked in. She has a chocolate allergy so the woman says the her husband,"I need more chocolate!"

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

why did the bus crash the driver was an alcoholic and was drunk he killed 8 people upon impact.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

Snooki

What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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