What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Your Mum's so fat, she's going to die.

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Guy 1: I had a Energy Drink the other day, I crashed. Guy 2: Really? That must of sucked. Guy 1: Yeah, the family in the other car died.

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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I was born.

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hi patrick

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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Roses are red, My watch is gold now get on your knees and do as your told

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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What's worse? Cleaning a New York bathroom, or getting stabbed. WELL I DON'T GIVE A GOD DAMN!!! They both suck!

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What did the bartender say to selena gomez? Your hot.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What's worse than an STD ridden Blonde Crack Whore? a black

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what's red and blue? your heart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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