David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

balls in ya mouf

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

noodles

why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

This is a joke for Homeless people:

How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

17 people are eating doritos in a cafeteria. Then, one gets up and throws their bag away. Then the joke ended. Haha it actually didn't.

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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