What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

You know what's funny? You got AIDs

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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