Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

Compton

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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