So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Stop Iran! We need the money.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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sweating like antoni with a girl

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

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Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

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What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

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what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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