Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

Alex Gedrose.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

roses are red violets are blue last time i dropped something this hard it ended world war 2?

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

how did the girl die? she read all of your terrible anti-jokes.

An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

what are three short words? i a am

Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

Whats the difference between a car and a baby? I would have a hard time throwing a car.

Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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