Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

You're so fat. Well maybe to kids born in Africa.

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother

a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

What did the jerk say to the Mexican? You are a Mexican

Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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