roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

thumb_up thumb_down +9

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama so fat she at the rest of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I'm so hot my father calls me son.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

thumb_up thumb_down +5

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

thumb_up thumb_down +97

Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What has three eyes, scales, seventeen stomachs, and can produce milk? Nothing. Nature has not yet evolved any animal to these specifications.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops