How many people does it take to drive a car? 1 person

Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Where do black guys sit in the bus? Enywhere theres a free seat

Why was the little boy screaming? He was going down a steep drop on a roller coaster.

Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

A Irishman walks into a bar... he suffers severe head injuries.

who likes fried chicken? almost everyone because fried chicken is delicious

What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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