What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

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3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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