My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

You're flying over a lake in your canoe and the wheels fall off. How many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? None! because ice-Cream doesn't have legs!

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

"You two form fours while I get the other one"

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

yfygcugyuyc

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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