why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the blind lady say to her cat? Nothing she doesn't have a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

So you all no Dora right, well why is she always lost in the forest wit her friend boots? Whats the deal with the map everybody knows maps cannot talk!!!!!!!!!!!! What the heck is wrong with the makers of the show!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

7

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

thumb_up thumb_down -50

There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -54

So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

thumb_up thumb_down -84

what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops