why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

An Asian child flunks a test.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...